Fresh Start

I've never looked forward to the end of summer but the start of the school year has been a breath of fresh air around here.  Our summer was so fun, but both girls were very eager to start school and I could not wait to get all of the past miscarriage stuff behind me.  September felt like a big milestone and one I was more than a little relieved to reach.

Thankfully, my surgery was exactly what I needed to get over the latest miscarriage.  I remember, back in July, telling Rhett over and over, "I don't even care about being pregnant or having a baby, I just want to be NORMAL again!"  And finally, mercifully, I can say that I am back to normal.

Getting back to my old self meant I could begin fertility testing.  I have such a new appreciation for the struggles that women go though.  My clinic e-mails out couples' stories periodically and they have opened my eyes to some pretty amazing journeys.  We're talking women in their early 30s with no healthy eggs left, women who go through endless cycles of IVF, women with cancer.  In short I realized my life ain't that bad.

The testing all came back pretty normal.  The only things that were off were not big deals--one of my hormone levels is slightly high and I carry a genetic blood clotting disorder.  How much either one of those things has affected past pregnancies is highly debatable.  Should I wish to try again, my doctor has suggested taking some over the counter and prescription medications that may support a healthy pregnancy.  The drugs come with very low risks so there aren't any big reasons not to take them.

I feel extremely laid back about getting pregnant and no longer feel a push to make it happen.  This is a very comfortable place to be.  I should have known the whole time that I'm not in control, but it was difficult for me to live that way.

Cate was also thrilled to reach September.  She started at a little church-based Kindergarten on September 2.  There are eight kids in her class, and she has half days Monday and Friday.  They have circle time, singing, dancing, and music just like at preschool.  But now she's also doing science, computers, Spanish, etc.  Kindergarten isn't what I remember--she already knows the difference between a parallelogram and a rhombus.  I wasn't ready to be confused by her math worksheets for at least a few years.  If she comes home talking about asymptotes, I will just throw in the towel now.

Regardless, she is happy, having fun, and eager to learn.  This is all Rhett and I can hope for!

If Cate was thrilled about Kindergarten, Charlotte's excitement was at a fever pitch to start preschool. She's at Cate's old preschool and so happy.  Her school bag, her cubby, the classroom, the playground--she marvels at it all.  Charlotte loves her teachers so much, when she sees them, she starts jumping up and down.  Here's a little video I took of her the other day:

Here's to fresh starts!